Keeping the Hotline Open!

Dear Pilgrim,

Thanks you for the words of encouragement. In spite the challenges you face on this journey, I want to admonish you “do not give up.” It may be dark at this time, but remember that the morning comes, and it comes with the rising of the sun.

In addition to your communications, I also received several mails from others who're also on a journey of religious devotion. One set of communications that caught my attention came from a lady, who’s interesting in understanding a personal situation she faces, and how it relates to my “Petition” prayer.

Francine, the lady, send her questions and concerns in several parts. However, I selected one part of her several letters to discuss some salient issues we experience on this journey. Now, let’s look at an excerpt of Ms. Francine’s note:


Dear Musue
I'm in love with a guy. I'm still in love with him even more. We make love, but he doesn't kiss me. I want him to kiss me so bad and in your petition it says never be anxious for anything. My heart yearn for for his love I cant sleep at night sometimes I find myself crying because I fell in love again and it hurts me what do I do I pray even when I pray my feeling stays the same he ask me once was it lust or love I couldn't answer then but I think it's love cause it's hurting my heart staying away from him and acting like I dont care even though i think about him day and night and even while I was reading your PETITION. How can I let him know? What should I do here?
Francine

While the excerpt of Francine’s letter above (also within the comment's box of my last post) will serve as the focal point of our communication, we will also delve in other extenuating situations that will set the premise for expounding on other related issues.

When Francine sent her first communication, I did respond to some of her questions, and concerns. However, as our communication continued, I asked whether her concerns could be used to set the premise for this communication. Francine agreed, and has been awaiting this communication.

However, my first reminder to Francine was that I am not a professional Biblical Counselor; I am not a Minister of Divinity, neither am I a Psychologist, nor an expert at resolving relationship issues. However, with the help of my beloved husband, and some of the things I have learned since being married to this wonderful man, as well as my own experience on this spiritual journey, I anticipate that my open thinking and yours can serve as a stage for discussing and expanding our ideas on the issue.

Pilgrim, here we find ourselves. On our own journeys, we also experience relationship's issue, maybe not the kind of situation Francine faces, but we as human beings are interdependent, and therefore we interact with people, and in most cases, at different levels. I do interact with my husband, and our interaction varies: we interact as married couples; we interact professionally when we become enthusiastically engrossed in our works, we interact as negotiators, we interact as educators; and the list goes on. We also interact when we fellowship, and study the bible for spiritual growth. There’s no boundary to how we interact, and the depth of our interactions. And in our interactions, we communicate.

When I read Francine’s comments, one key element jumped at me: communication. Her reluctance to express her feelings to the person she is involved with points to a key problem in the relationship. And why is this lack of communication a problem?

Communication is important is every relationship. In our relationship with God, we communicate through prayers, fellowship, reading His Word, and discussing the Bible with others. God communicates with us using a wide variety of medium, and also through His words. When we fail to communicate with God, we begin to slide in our journey, and in our relationship with God. Likewise, if I fail to communicate with my husband, our relationship begins to experience bumps. Like Francine who probably assumed that (those we interact with) her male lover knows what’s in her mind, many of use also assume God knows what we are thinking; and the other person knows exactly what we are thinking. That’s a mistake. Remember that, we human beings are not crystal balls to read the other person’s mind. In the case of God, John 14; 14 state: Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it! Can you ask without communicating? Obviously, that is impossible. And for us human beings, we don’t have the luxury of using a crystal ball to determine each other’s thoughts. That is why we need to spend time telling each other exactly what we want, how we feel, and what we think. That is the inportance of communication. The importance of effective communication becomes evident when dealing with members of the other sex.

I hope that an opened and warm communication will give Francine and her male friend the opportunity to discuss the ultimate goal, if any for their relationship; the kind of relationship they desire, and what they wish to accomplish. As individuals, the values they hold, and what values they can share, including spirituality. Are they fishing, or looking to keep? And one big element is loyalty, and support, which I do not in anyway intend to impose, but I believe it is crucial. I see loyalty and support as fundamental yardsticks for the value a person holds; their perception of themselves, and the level of regard they have for their partner, and their family. Once loyalty becomes a question, trust becomes an issue, then the relationship is empty, futile, and morelike irrelevant, and for me a deadbeat. That is why i consider communication as not only important, but priceless. Verbal and non verbal Communication provides the platform for people to talk, chat, joke, and it is during such times, we learned about the things others value, the lives they live, their aspirations, and where or whather you are in their future, or part of their vision. It is also at such time you can determine whether you want to be where they want to place you. Do you want to be fished, or to be a part of their future? I can't answer that for you?

In our relationship with God, he places us on the pedestal, proud for all the world to see that he loves us. He also tell us about where we stand in his plan. God's promises for us are many, including "Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." God has promised that all things work together for good to those who love and serve Him faithfully (Romans 8:28).So God wants us to loove Him Faithfully. The word faithfully, according to the Roget's dictionary, the synonyms and meaning for faithfully includes, devotedly , lovingly, attentively, supportively, fondly, and not partially, or in bits.

Regarding my Petition prayer, I will urge Francine, as I encourage myself, to delve more into the Word of God for comfort, and also begin to lean more on God for wisdom and strength in facing our everyday challenges. We all go through trials and tribulations during our lives. There's not a single person in this world, who has not experienced an awful or terrible situation. However, the difference lies in how we handle, and cope with these situations. How do you handle the situations you face? How do I cope with my challenges? We deal with our situations differently, but the question becomes: Should we allow these upsetting, or traumatic events to shake our faith or to strengthen it! Let's quickly look again at Romans 8:28: "In all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Sometimes it is difficult to embrace this promise, but we must learn to trust him. To continue to hold on to his promises, I draw strength and courage from my experiences, and how he helped me overcome and or successfully face those situations.

As painful as our situations may be, as shameful as they appear, we must readily remember that we will come out victorious if we put our trust in Him. Of course during the dark periods, when it feels like we are in the rough waters we must crawl, and grasp His hand; we must feed on his promises, we must move our lips and call his name, because he is waiting to hear from us. Matthew 11:28 states: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest," and in Jeremiah 31:25, "I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint."

So you see Pilgrim, in our relationship with others, and with God, communicatio is important. Communication is the impetus to every successful relationship' it is the hotline, so let's keep it alive, let's keep it open!

Always,
musue